Wednesday, July 9, 2008

A Life Lesson to be Learned - and Learned NOW!

Other people may be there to help us, teach us, guide us along our path, but the lesson to be learned is always ours.


My father passed away almost 10 years ago after a brave and courageous struggle with Cancer.

During that challenging time, and during his battle to stay here with us, he taught us who watched and assisted him in his fight a very, very valuable lesson!

Besides showing us a lesson in courage, tenacity, and a "Never Quit" attitude, it was a seemingly normal comment that set me thinking!

My father was a Great man - a great Dad and an even better friend and confidant!

There is not a day that passes where I do not wish he was still here with us to see our kids, and do the "Grandfather" things I know he and the kids would love to be doing together!

However, during his illness he was blown away by the outpouring of love, respect, kindness and the amazing show of caring that person after person brought to him as he weakened and drew closer to his next "Journey".

I remember asking him "Dad, why are you so surprised by all of this? You have many friends that obviously love and care for you".

His response was what stunned me and brings me to my point and lesson today.

He lifted his head and said to me "Son, I had no idea that all of these people cared about me so much".

75 years on this earth - involved and immersed in relationships the entire time - and he had zero idea that so many people cared for him and loved him!!!

That was an "eye-opener" for me indeed!

How could that occur?

The lesson I learned from my Dad and his illness is three-fold and I hope I can impart it on you while you all are healthy, have the whole future ahead of you, and can still enjoy your life!

It is as follows:

1. Life is Short! I know what you just uttered - "Duh- No kidding - it is on every book and cliche-ridden pillowcase in America!" -- But it is IMPORTANT to grasp it and not pass it off!

Life is Short and if you do NOT take advantage of the TIME we have at our disposal - the "Blessing of Time" we have and take for granted every single day -- unless we believe and appreciate this fact we are all destined to end up in the same spot -- Wishing for more time when we realize it is finally limited! and that is not a fun spot!

2. People Do Not Say what they Feel --- We can go our whole lives in a relationship of any kind and NEVER really let the person we care about KNOW that we care about them - or how great we think they are - or how much we appreciate them in our lives - or how great we think they are!! This is a Crime and something we can Change TODAY!

Pick someone in your life and pen them a short note - all it has to say is "Thank you" for being in my life - thanks for the love and friendship - and that you BELIEVE in that person!

Why Not? Trust me -- that person NEEDS to hear it - YOU need to let them know! It is a Win -Win! I Guarantee that you will feel like a Million Bucks (or Euros) afterward!!

There is nothing sadder or more idiotic than losing the chance to tell the people in your life that your LIFE is a BETTER place for them being in it with you!!

3. UNDERSTAND that people love and care for you even if they DO NOT SAY it! Do not end up on your death bed astonished at the fact that you had a Major impact on people's lives like my Dad did -- only when it is too late to enjoy it!

Refer to point #2 above -- Do Not Wait for the people in our lives to tell us how they feel - most will not -- but UNDERSTAND that you are loved and cared for even when you do not feel it!

Enjoy your Day! Go pick up the pen, write to that person (the more the better) and shoot off that letter today!! Trust me - there is nothing better than to give that to someone - unexpectedly - and it will stay with them their entire life!

When you have done it - place a "comment" on this site and I would love to hear your feedback on how it made you feel!

It sure beats a bunch of flowers or a cheesecake!

Miss you Dad - and Thanks -as always - for the Lesson!!

Stay Strong!!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Excellent post D Fresh... Ed Flaherty was (and still is in spirit) a GREAT man...and to the point--so ARE YOU my brutha! Thank TOT (small child) for the excellent post/article on the young man with cancer. BTW this bllog article em=ncouraged me to reach out to a friend--Tom Kelly-- whose Mom just passed away. I don't speak to Tom much on the phone but usually see him when I'm Boston--he owns a bar, say nomo. Anywho, called him, sent flowers...thought it might seem a little intrusive but whateva...hadn't seen his Mom in YEARS but she always had a smile when I did...well he seemed to appreciate the call.....and then called me back later with appreciations....so thanks for inspiration skittles.

CIM said...

Thank you for your Note KeyNote!

Right back at you - Glad you were inspired and you made several people's day with your self-less actions!

Now go get that MBA finished and let's get you back to NYC where it all begins!