Monday, June 30, 2008

Take Action!!!

A tremendous component of being Strong in Spirit, Mind, and Body is our need and ability to ACT!
While the Mind is critical to managing and recognizing our emotions as discussed earlier - it is not enough to change our lives if we do not ACT as well!

Now - say you want to be in better shape - you do not have to go out and run a marathon your first day! Want to make more money - well put together that resume and send it out! Want better relationships?
Well just hoping and wishing will not make it happen!
You have to get into positive frame of mind and GET OUT THERE!

It is perfectly fine to take "Baby Steps" toward your Goals -- but the KEY is to TAKE THAT FIRST BABY STEP!

Woody Allen famously stated "80% of all Success is Showing Up" -- and it is True!
You have to "Show Up" - i.e ACT - to make any progress! and that includes the smallest of Baby Steps!

Start today - get a piece of paper and LIST out your Goals! Then - directly across from the Goal DEFINE an ACTION STEP you VOW to take IMMEDIATELY to put you on the path to that Goal!

You will be amazed at the POWER you will feel just identifying these Goals and then ACTING on them!
Remember the Poem "Gods in the Chrysallis" posted below ( ??

Get that paper and pen and Take Your Life Back!!

You will never feel so alive and in control!

Stay Strong!!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008


Living in arguably the busiest and most stressful City in the World can present many challenges, situations, and opportunities for our Enemy # 1 & 2 --- STRESS and FEAR!!

And even if you live in rural America, STRESS and FEAR threaten our daily existence and are always lurking and seeking an opportunity to PARALYZE and STOP our ambitions and DREAMS!

The Good News is that we ALWAYS possess the POWER to squash FEAR and STRESS - 24 Hours a Day - 365 X 7 as they say!

Here is one Tip to focus on as the "Stress and the Fear" chip away at us and attempt to make us capitulate to their intended results:

RELEASE the outcome!

That is right -- Simply "release the outcome" to a Higher Power (whatever Power that may be to you - God, Allah, The Universe, etc...).

Now you may be saying many things in response to this tip -- "How do I do that?" or "That is an old cliche" or perhaps "That cannot work"...

Well, I will ask you to reflect on this for one second.

The current state of all of our lives is a direct result of the DECISIONS, ACTIONS, THOUGHTS, and CHOICES that WE HAVE ALL MADE ON OUR OWN!!!

Now ask yourself - are you 100% satisfied and content with these decisions and choices that have put you where you are today???

Well - if the answer is "No" to the question above - it begs the question "If you see the results of YOUR decisions and actions - based solely on your own judgements, isn't it worth a chance to leave the next decision to a Higher Power?"

What do you have to lose? As TOT stated, "Once you are in a Hole - STOP DIGGING!!"

Well -Next time you are in a stressful situation - or a fearful instance -or a Cross-Roads that calls for a judgement or a Decision - Release the decision to a Higher Power!

Have FAITH that the decision and path will reveal itself to you - do not impose YOUR OWN OLD JUDGEMENTS on this one -- try a new tack!

No one is against you -- BELIEVE and HAVE FAITH in what is to come!


This is the way life was intended to be led --- so get to it and start enjoying your LIFE!

Stay Strong!

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Monday, June 23, 2008

Control any Situation in Your Life... NOW!

See things as you would have them be instead of as they are.

So much of our existence is based on the "unknown" - in fact we spend most of our lives searching for answers to so many questions that we often forget to LIVE our lives!!

We cannot let that continue!

What if I told you that I can show you a fool-proof way to add more control to your human interactions, your work day, your personal time, you career, your "playtime", etc! A way to pre-pave results that you WANT - and will come to EXPECT - as opposed to firing away and hoping for the Best?

The concept is a sort of "pre-planning" exercise that you do prior to any interaction, meeting, conversation, event, etc.

It does not take long to master once you have the hang of it -- and it is based on a key concept we advocate and strongly believe in -- VISUALIZATION!

Here is how you do it --- Prior to any meeting or event that you want to succeed, you must take a few moments and pre-pave what you WANT to come from that meeting or event.

As an example, say you are meeting someone for the first time - say for an interview for a job. As the interviewee and job seeker, your goal is to IMPRESS the other party in order to possibly land the job.

Prior to the meeting - close your eyes and visualize HOW YOU WANT that meeting to go. Picture yourself calm, poised, in control, confident - the pure IMAGE of a Winner!

Continue to visualize yourself speaking of your accomplishments, your skils and talents- and picture the interviewers reactions as you calmly and confidently stride through the interview - never losing your composure, always thinking through the answers briefly before answering.
Picture what you will wear - see yourself dressed to perfection and impeccable -- and see yourself walking out of that interview satisfied, confident that you did your best and see the interviewer impressed and wanting to hire you!

Really visualize it clearly in your mind -the MORE DETAILS the BETTER- the sounds, smells, sights, emotions - release all of the FEAR and UNCERTAINTY and really experience how it will feel to get that job offer!
Practice this in everyday meetings - set the goal in your mind as to what you WANT to come from your interactions - and the stronger and better visualizer you will become!
You WILL see a difference in your results quickly!

Try it today -- Trust me - it works!

Monday?? So What - it is just another day to experience the beauty and challenges of life - and it has NO HOLD on your emotions UNLESS you allow it to!

Deep Breath - step back and enjoy your day --- PRE-PAVE what YOU WANT in your Head first- and the rest of it will be DELIVERED to you!

Stay Strong!~

Friday, June 20, 2008

Fallon O'Toole McIntyre 2002-2004

Tomorrow marks the 4th year Anniversary of my niece and God- Daughter Fallon's passing.

She of the amazingly deep and beautiful blue eyes! We miss her every day of our lives and it is hard to believe it has been four years since she was taken from us!

Her love and the AMAZING STRENGTH she displayed as a two year old battling a horrible disease serves as an inspiration to us all and Fallon's lesson and legacy live on even STRONGER today!

During your wonderful and hopefully peaceful weekend, please take a few moments to stop and say a little prayer of Remembrance for such a strong, beautiful and courageous little girl who, although she was with us only a short while, had a purpose and a lesson for all of us! Love and be loved and take each day for the beauty that it brings!

We love and Miss You, Fallie!

To meet and learn about Fallon's legacy and story please visit her Memorial Site and sign her Guest Book at the bottom of the page -- >

Gods Bless and Stay Strong!

The Mind is a Terrible thing to....."misunderstand"

Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same.
~Francesca Reigler

I had the blues because I had no shoes, until upon the street, I met a man who had no feet.
~Ancient Persian Saying

What a spectacular day in NYC - High 60's, sunny, mild and a phenomenal day to get out and exercise, walk, run, and enjoy this weather! Being a Friday does not hurt the mood either!

Walking in midtown this morning, it was impossible to not notice the change in people's moods when a Friday rolls in versus the moods on a Monday! That observation set my mind to a thinkin' - WHY is that so and HOW can we harness this powerful, FRIDAY Attitude, Enthusiasm, and Mood EVERY DAY of the Week?

And it hit me! WE CAN!!!! WE HAVE THE ABILITY!!

The depth and power of the Human Mind is, ironically, beyond any human beings' true understanding and comprehension!

Think about that - The Human Mind cannot comprehend the power of itself! Or at least cannot communicate it to us!

What we DO know about the human mind is that it has the ability to create, destroy, dictate and alter any of our emotions!

ALL of our EMOTIONS are really in essence boiled down into TWO categories --


All of the other classifications of Emotions are subcategories under these two main categories!

Anger, fear, ecstasy, frustration, melancholy, excitement, etc -- these are ALL under either HAPPY or NOT HAPPY!!

This is the frame of reference we must operate under going forward - Am I Happy or Am I Not Happy?

Now - back to the power of the Human Mind!

WE - no one else, no other factor, Nada, Zilch - NOTHING or NO ONE ELSE - decides our emotions!!! OUR MIND controls it!

Let's stay on this for a moment because it is that critically important!!

YOU decide how you feel at any given moment!!

You may be frustrated at work and it APPEARS that the "work" issue is making you UNHAPPY! BUT it is not the work issue - it is your DECISION to let that issue infiltrate your mind and the emotion you CHOOSE - frustration- is NOT HAPPY!

If we properly HARNESS the Power of the Mind to monitor these emotions and RECOGNIZE that when we FEEL NOT HAPPY we are FOCUSED and CHOOSING the WRONG emotion in our minds - we will be able to STOP and BREAK that negative thought compounding!!

Read that part again -- What it comes down to is WE ARE NOT PRISONERS to consequence - or to anyone or anything! WE CHOOSE to be Miserable or Joyous!!

But -- HOW do we harness the mind?

Think about "drug" use! Drug use is an artificial substitute for what I am offering to you -- it is simply an "altering of the mind" through artificial substances!

Well - ask yourself -- if an artificial substance can alter my emotions, my mindset, my awareness simply by changing the chemicals in my mind - WHY CAN'T WE ALTER our emotions the same way through our THOUGHTS??

The only positive I can take from drug use is the critical point here and that is that THE MIND CAN BE MANIPULATED AND ALTERED and so can our Moods and Outlooks!!

Drug use, Alzheimer's on the negative side, Hypnosis -- ALL of these are proof that if we alter the mind, we have the ability to CHANGE BEHAVIOR, MOOD, EMOTIONS!

(I flashback to College and the eponymous "Hypnotist" that visits all schools as entertainment - and all I need to do is recall the Class Valedictorian on all fours on the stage in front of the student body- eating imaginary food out of an imaginary Dog Bowl and Barking to remind me of the "proof" that the mind controls behavior!!)

So - There is no REASON we cannot feel the way we do on this Glorious Friday on a "gloomy, doomy, Monday morning instead!!

WE CAN if we learn to focus our thoughts on "GROWTH - FUTURE - POTENTIAL"---and not on the "Woe is me" Monday attitude we have allowed ourselves to fall into every single week!

RECOGNIZE that YOU control it --- you can dictate your emotions, your attitudes, YOUR LIVES!

But you have to FOCUS on what you WANT - Not necessarily WHAT YOU HAVE!

Are you in a stinky job? Do not focus on that fact - FOCUS instead and VISUALIZE what you want to do next! What is your dream job? Visualize that job and then TAKE ACTION!!

Devise a Plan -- Take the First Step! Even if it is just doing your resume it is a start!

And DO NOT LET ANYONE talk you out of it!!! The biggest stifler of ambition is listening to others who discourage you!

Imagine -- a life full of Fridays!!

YOU CONTROL whether today is "Friday" or "Monday"!!!

Which will you choose?

Enjoy the Weekend - God Bless - and Stay Strong!

Thursday, June 19, 2008

The Eagle's Wet Wings -- Posted by "The Eagle"

Dear Everybody,

I’ve been to plenty of concerts in my life. From being in the very last row of the Meadowlands for Billy Joel and Elton John (where the video screens didn’t sync with the music, since sound travels slower than light), to front row at U2 right after 9/11 (an emotional experience that can never be matched). So when I was offered to tickets to see R.E.M. on Saturday night, I leapt at the chance. Last concert I went to was (sigh) Poison and Cinderella. Please don’t ask me to explain. No really, please don’t.

Anyway, the venue for the concert is one of the greatest in the U.S.: The Nikon Theater at Jones Beach, outdoors and right on the water. During the summer you can smell the salt off the inlet, down a brew in the parking lot and catch a concert as the sun goes down over the ocean. Pure musical heaven.

So here I am, with my friend Lauren when the opening band comes on (Modest Mouse, great music, highly recommended). A few songs into their set, a few raindrops fall. Then a few more. Then fat drops, nickel-sized ones pelting my bald pate. We quickly huddle under the bleachers, escaping the torrent descending from the heavens.

"It’s pretty humid," I comment. "We’re due for a bit of--"

KRAKKA-KA-THOOOM!!! Ozone permeates my nostrils a split second before the entire ampitheater shakes -- shakes!!! -- and we realize the stadium was just struck by lightning.

The P.A. Announcer comes on the microphone: "For your own safety, please find shelter underneath the concourse." Lauren’s shaken up but hanging tough. I take her hand and walk her down the stadium steps (‘cause in a lightning storm, really ain’t too smart to hold a metal handrail. Just a thought…). At the bottom, we see the storm’s impact: the entire plaza is flooded. People caught in the rain react as if literal pennies from heaven are crashing into them. An ugly, ugly scene.

"I’m not dressed for this, I gotta go," Lauren tells me. Perfectly understandable, and as she leaves I have to make a choice: do I wait it out, hope the rain subsides, or head home to the comfort of my couch?

Decisions like this are a lot like life: at the first sign of distress, do you retreat to the known, wait for more security, or venture outright into the unknown? What kind of person are you?

The storm’s intensity increased, threads of lightning illuminate the sky in beauty and terror as we bear witness to flooding. No way R.E.M.’s playing in this…

"Ladies and Gentlemen, R.E.M. will take the stage in ten minutes!" Are you kidding? No, nope, can’t be happening, they expect people to watch them in this torrential downpour? it all that crazy? Rock 'n' Roll vs. Mother Nature; who wins that battle?

Once again, ask yourself what kind of person you are. Seek out shelter from whatever falls on you, or hold your head up high and potentially experience something new? Play it safe or take a risk?

My phone rings; it’s my friend Jessica, also at the concert and a few gates down. "What are you doing?"

"It’s just water. I’m gonna watch ‘em. You?"

"Me too!" she responded. And soon, we squatted in center-row seats abandoned by the less adventurous, watching Michael Stipe open with "Have You Ever Seen the Rain?" Classic…

* * * * *

And today…I have pneumonia.

Standing in the rain for two hours as wind blows off the water and chills you will do that to you.

So I’m downing Chloraseptic like it’s going out of style and having a lot of soup, still…the experience was fantastic. Nothing like hearing the crash of drums accompanied by actual thunder. Music as wave after wave of rain cascades on top of you. Something I wouldn’t trade for the world.

So go ahead. Laugh at my expense. Tell me I’m dumb for standing in the rain listening to music I love. Tell me I deserve to be sick.

And I’ll tell you I’ll get better. And I’ll have an experience you’ll never share. And a million others just like it, because I had the guts to do what you didn’t.

Enjoy all the comforts you have, but don’t be a slave to them. If you don’t realize it, they could become your own prison. But free from their grasp, you can do anything you want…even if it means having a case of the sniffles.

Just something to think about; hope this email finds you well.

Peace Out,
The Eagle

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Victory and Fear!

Thought of the day:

" I can't stand a ball player who plays in fear. Any fellow who has a good shot has got to take it and keep taking it. So he misses- so what?"

Red Auerbach NBA Coach and GM, Owner

Perfect timing as the Celtics notched their 17th Championship last evening. As we enter our daily journey, that word Fear comes into play. The question to you is " How does it serve you?

Is it empowering or is it destroying.

Quick reference, the Celtics played as a team and weren't afraid to shoot.
They needed each other through the principle of ALLIED EFFORT. Working hard together.
The Lakers past up numerous opportunities from their shooters, and got smashed.

Is "Fear" Controlling what you do, or are you beating it back down and getting empowered by beating it?

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

This too shall pass....

It is a phrase we hear all the time, but seldom do we understand the truth and power behind this statement!


Every one of us at some time has been caught in a "storm" of negativity, chaos, fear, unease, confusion, despair and hopelessness.

You may be in it right this very second!

During these periods, it is seemingly impossible to weather the storm, see the light through the clouds, and grasp the fact that whatever it is that we have going on - no matter how bad - IT WILL PASS!


So much of the despair in our lives and situations derives from the FEAR of the unknown outcome - yet to arrive!

We build up our fears in anticipation of the worst case scenario - and we allow these negative thoughts to compound inside us, to build up and gain momentum - and eventually they completely overwhelm us!

If we allow this to occur we end up in a state of HOPELESSNESS!! And this is a place we need to avoid at all costs!

Sounds pretty bad huh? Well it is bad but guess what - it is NOT PERMANENT! You can avoid it and if you end up there - YOU CAN MAKE IT BACK!!

We can combat these compounded negative thoughts if we can IDENTIFY them and STOP the pattern immediately!

Break the pattern of the build-up in any way possible --- Say to yourself:


So much of our dissatisfaction and misery with our lives comes from WORRY about things that WILL NEVER HAPPEN to us!

Think about that!!!

Worry and FEAR are two crippling emotions that WE DO NOT HAVE TO EXPERIENCE!!

In essence WE cause our own unhappiness by WORRYING about situations, scenarios, outcomes that will never come to fruition!!

Imagine if we could SIMPLY ACCEPT that whatever happens is out of our reach sometimes and KNOW that no matter what it is we will SURVIVE it!

Imagine how much more peaceful life would be if we could just say:

"I do not want this to happen to me, but it is out of my control now and whatever results I will accept - and I will survive it".

Take a moment now and think of the absolute worst thing that you feel has happened to you in your life!

Now, put that event in perspective and realize that:





When you are in the maelstrom of fear and chaos -- TAKE FAITH that it will indeed pass - that you have to let it go and accept the outcome - no matter how bad it may seem now - and KNOW in your heart of hearts it is not the end of the world!

You are NEVER alone no matter how alone you may feel -- times will get better - your feelings will get better -- THIS TOO SHALL PASS and you WILL come out stronger and wiser and more peaceful on the other side!!

Trust - Believe - and Stay Strong!

Monday, June 16, 2008

More on Beating Monday Blues!

Three tips to beat Monday blues

Sadhana March 07, 2005

One morning, I woke up savouring the freshness of the golden sunlight, enjoying the sun's rays filtering through my window.

The first thought that popped into my mind was: "Thank God it's Monday!"

I was startled by my own thought. While the whole world is grumbling and groaning about Monday, unwilling to let go of lovely, lazy Sunday, here I was, chirping about the first working day of the week.

And why not? If it is Monday, it means the shops will be open, the government offices will function, the courier service will bring that much-awaited parcel. And life will move on full-speed.

Isn't that cause for jubilation?

Contemporary man is completely sold to the idea of the weekend and, therefore, horrified by the idea of working seven days a week. People drag themselves through workdays so they can relax in the evenings. They endure the week so they can have the weekend.

They work through the year so that they can go on leave at the end of the year. If we stretch the logic a little further, they put up with life so that they can relax in death.

Instead of justifying the need for a holiday, let us look at the quality of our working life.
Perhaps some Osho insights can help change the way we work.

The basic question is, do you enjoy your work?

Do you work wishing you could do something else? Is your work a necessary evil -- to earn a living or to fulfil ambition?

1. What and how What you do is not important, it is how you do it. Whatever you do, do it with deep alertness; then even small things become sacred. You can clean the floor like a robot; you have to clean it, so you clean it.

But it could have been a great experience; you missed it.

You cleaned the floor and that would have cleansed you. Clean the floor full of awareness; be luminous with awareness.

Happy Monday

Last week I wrote about my Doctor who had an amazing outlook on life and how he enjoys every moment (scroll below)- he really strives to enjoy every action during his day! As I rolled out of bed this morning after a tremendous Father's Day with my family, I was hit smack in the face with the "Monday" haymaker punch! Suddenly, I remembered what the good Doctor had told me about why Monday's do not affect him negatively and I tried to adopt his philosophy (and not be a hypocrite with my writings)!~

Well lo and behold --- BINGO! It works!!

Do not dwell on Monday - or any day - it is NOT the DAY that rules our emotions!! It is how we take on and view the day!

Just open your eyes and recognize the beauty in each day - taking out the recyclables (arrghh), the garbage, feeding the dog, getting the newspapers, etc! These mundane events can be sources of beauty and PEACE- IF you set your mind to accept it!

Turn your mind channel like a remote control on your TV --- focus on the positive! Change the channel on the PAST and the Monday Blues!

So smile at your neighbor, your family - strangers - whomever ---Re-read "Gods in the Chrysalis" posted below -- and really take THAT into your heart and soul each and every morning!

If you truly do, NOTHING, and NO ONE will be able to derail your strength and happiness TODAY - or ANY DAY for that matter!

Go Get 'Em!

Stay Strong!

Friday, June 13, 2008

Posted by TOT

Father Forgets:

Great piece found in Dale Carnegie's , "How to Win Friends and Influence People".

Learn to appreciate each day!

Food for thought.

How would you like to be the Boston Celtics today? Great win, historic comeback. Up three games to one lead in the best of 7 series. Momentum clearly on your side. Chemisty is Herculean, no fear. They know they have the Lakers on the ropes.

How would you like to be Phil Jackson today? Stomach in knots. Humiliated far beyond anyone’s wildest imagination. 9 time champion, watched his team play one of the greatest half’s of basketball, all cylinders pumping, LA, the excitement, the crowd, belief, frenzy, all to vanish before his eyes. Sheer ecstasy to sheer horror!

Such is life, we usually find ourselves caught in the middle. We will deal with both extremes. Much like father forgets, they are just barometers.

Appreciate what you have and realize that the highs and lows are inevitable.

" In life there is neither happiness or unhappiness, it’s all a comparison of one state to another. Only A person who has dealt with ultimate despair is cabable of ultimate bliss. A man has got to wish to die, in order to know how good it is to live. "

- Alexander Dumas
"The Count of Monte Cristo "

Happy Father's Day to All!

One night a father overheard his son pray: Dear God, Make me the kind of man my Daddy is. Later that night, the Father prayed, Dear God, Make me the kind of man my son wants me to be."
-- Author Unknown."

I will take this opportunity to wish all of the Fathers out there a peaceful, happy, and relaxing Father's Day Weekend.

I will also take this opportunity to share one of my most favorite poems ever written about Fathers, children and human failings - to put things in perspective for all of us Dads - so we Don't Forget!

Enjoy - God Bless - and Stay Strong!

Father Forgets
by W. Livingston Larned

Listen, son; I am saying this as you lie asleep, one little paw crumpled under your cheek and the blond curls stickily wet on your damp forehead.

I have stolen into your room alone. Just a few minutes ago, as I sat reading my paper in the library, a stifling wave of remorse swept over me. Guiltily I came to your bedside.

There are things I was thinking, son:

I had been cross to you. I scolded you as you were dressing for school because you gave your face merely a dab with a towel. I took you to task for not cleaning your shoes. I called out angrily when you threw some of your things on the floor.

At breakfast I found fault, too. You spilled things. You gulped down your food. You put your elbows on the table. You spread butter too thick on your bread.

And as you started off to play and I made for my train, you turned and waved a hand and called, "Goodbye, Daddy!" and I frowned, and said in reply, "Hold your shoulders back!"

Then it began all over again in the late afternoon. As I came Up the road, I spied you, down on your knees, playing marbles. There were holes in your stockings. I humiliated you before you boyfriends by marching you ahead of me to the house. Stockings were expensive - and if you had to buy them you would be more careful!

Imagine that, son, from a father!

Do you remember, later, when I was reading in the library, how you came in timidly, with a sort of hurt look in your eyes? When I glanced up over my paper, impatient at the interruption, you hesitated at the door. "What is it you want?" I snapped.

You said nothing, but ran across in one tempestuous plunge, and threw your arms around my neck and kissed me, and your small arms tightened with an affection that God had set blooming in your heart and which even neglect could not wither.

And then you were gone, pattering up the stairs.

Well, son, it was shortly afterwards that my paper slipped from my hands and a terrible sickening fear came over me.

What has habit been doing to me? The habit of finding fault, of reprimanding - this was my reward to you for being a boy.

It was not that I did not love you; it was that I expected too much of youth.

I was measuring you by the yardstick of my own years.

And there was so much that was good and fine and true in your character. The little heart of you was as big as the dawn itself overthe wide hills. This was shown by your spontaneous impulse to rush in and kiss me good night.

Nothing else matters tonight, son.

I have come to your bedside in the darkness, and I have knelt there, ashamed!

It is a feeble atonement; I know you would not understand these things if I told them to you during your waking hours.

But tomorrow I will be a real daddy! I will chum with you, and suffer when you suffer, and laugh when you laugh.

I will bite my tongue when impatient words come.

I will keep saying as if it were a ritual: "He is nothing but a boy - a little boy!"

I am afraid I have visualized you as a man.

Yet as I see you now, son, crumpled and weary in your cot, I see that you are still a baby.

Yesterday you were in your mother's arms, your head on her shoulder.
I have asked too much, too much.

Thursday, June 12, 2008

To Err is Human.....

Try to imagine how different your life would be if you weren't so hard on yourself about the mistakes, missteps, and errors that inevitably occur as we go through this journey of joy.

We all must accept that we are going to goof, mess up, offend someone, forget something important, not do or say the proper thing at the proper time - or just act like a jack-arse at some point in our lives.

The reality of it is that we often make mistakes more as a rule than an exception.

Guess what - -IT IS OK!

So much valuable time, pain, suffering and analysis is WASTED on the constant dwelling on our errors!

Something that may have taken 5 seconds or less to occur ends up costing us much more in that we will spend hours, sometimes days or weeks or months or God forbid - YEARS -mulling it over in our heads, replaying it in our minds and once again RE-LIVING and FEELING that remorse that lasted 5 seconds!

Do you see how CRAZY that is??

If you mess-up -- MOVE ON and learn from the mistake!

It is that Simple!!

Do not re-hash it over and over - do not give it any more thought -- simply tell your mind to forget it and move on!

If you harmed others as a result, you can make amends as necessary but do not let the act fester and eat away at you.

Forgiveness is not only for others that have hurt you in some way - it is also for YOURSELF!

Forgive yourself immediately for any errors you make and MOVE on!

Remember - it was not your first mistake/error and it certainly will not be your last - so make this part of your DAILY DISCIPLINE -- Forgive!!

Before your head hits that pillow at night -- Tell yourself:

"Today was a great day in many ways. I made some mistakes and I did some good things. I forgive myself for my errors and will try to do better tomorrow. But those errors are in the past and there they shall remain. Tomorrow is a fresh start"

Life can be hard enough without beating yourself up over simply being a human being!

Stay Strong and Keep Smiling -- Life is GOOD if you simply recognize how good you have it!

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Lights!! Camera!! ACTION!

“Stop acting as if life is a rehearsal. Live this day as if it were your last. The past is over and gone. The future is not guaranteed.”

- Wayne Dyer

Granted, it is very easy to say that happiness and joy are within our reaches and easily obtainable. However, statements such as these beg the question - "HOW do I get there?" and "WHAT do I do to obtain it?"

These are critical questions and without understanding HOW to get where you want to go or not knowing WHAT you must do to get there - we are simply sitting and waiting for it to occur!

And how often does something come to you that you sit and wait on? Not very often in my experience.

Tip #1

Think of your most favorite actor or actress - someone you simply love to watch and admire their acting talents on the Big Screen or on TV or Broadway!

Now the fun part - put yourself in their position!! What do I mean by that? I mean take on their specialty as you are going to be an actor/actress (is it still necessary to say "actress"?) for a few hours!

Never acted before? Maybe on Broadway you haven't but all of us have "acted" in some way during our lives! All of us have acted "interested" during a difficult discussion, "acted" surprised when in fact we knew what was coming, etc!

So you have more experience than you give yourself credit!

Well -- Today's role is EASY! You are going to ACT HAPPY!

Yes - that is the "direction" from the Director -- "ACT HAPPY as if you are CAREFREE and Filled with JOY!

Sounds silly, I know that -- but guess what, it will get you into the proper mindset and attitude and before you know it - YOU WILL START to FEEL HAPPY!

It is the Power of the mind! But YOU must give your mind the proper "direction" to win that Oscar!

Be detailed in your preparation -- tell yourself over and over that for this critical "role" - that you are playing yourself but you are HAPPY with all aspects of your life - you are joyous, you are wealthy, you are beautiful, skinny, fit, attractive, intelligent, in love, carefree, enthusiastic, HOPEFUL, etc!!

Try it --- you don't have to tell anyone about it - Just Do It (to steal the Nike motto)!!

I GUARANTEE that if you approach your day this way this morning and each morning- layout the role and the person you want to portray for this "movie" (your day) -- you will find yourself caught up in the acting and before you know it you will feel the effect!!


You can also see therefore the flip side is also true! If your character is depressed, morose, worried, fearful - you will feel that way in your role!

Which character are you going to choose in this "play" called our lives? Which one is more appealing to you? More fun to play?

So - get into character -- the curtain is going up -- Dive in NOW!!

All you have to lose is your FEAR!


Stay Strong!

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Pass it on...

Please pass this site on to others who you think may enjoy the content!

Also, feel free to comment and post your thoughts below any posts you read! We would love to hear your feedback!

Stay Strong!

"I could have done so much more.."

Who can possibly forget the moving scene at the end of the movie Schindler's List where Liam Neeson is coming to realize the enormity of what has occurred in his midst, only to lament and regret that he did not sell his car, or his gold pin, to save the lives of more victims. His heartache and pain is palpable as he realizes that, despite the fact he did more than many to save some lives during that horrible period in history, he could have done so much more to make an impact! He could have saved one more innocent life if.. if... if......

So often in our lives we miss real opportunities that we may never get back again - opportunities to impact other's lives and to help them during their struggles.

Life can be hard and challenging and "all-consuming" at times - there is no doubt about that!

However, you will find that if you SHIFT the focus of your worry, your disappointment, your fear, your concerns AWAY from your life and STRIVE to make a difference in someone else's life instead- it is INEVITABLE that you will feel better about your life!

Do not believe me?? Try it! It is a FACT - not a theory.

How many times during your day do you focus on how other's are struggling - how your spouse, or sibling, or co-worker, or parents, or even strangers you encounter are dealing with their challenges and hardships? How many times do you take a step back and "put yourselves in their shoes"?

It is not easy to do -- but if you make it part of your daily discipline and try that approach - as opposed to attacking or judging (the easy route)-- you will see an immediate improvement in your current situation!

Whether it is helping a stranger who is lost, helping someone on the subway or train, a smile to someone who looks in pain or to be suffering, a small compliment to someone known or unknown to you that just might turn their day around - a note to someone to tell them how much you appreciate them or a "thank you" note to someone who has been there for you.... taking a moment to stop and ask a neighbor how THEIR day is going..

How can this not make you feel better?? It is IMPOSSIBLE not to!!

Do not end up like Schindler - wishing you had done more, wish you had taken the action to help someone more when they needed it - AFTER THE FACT - and regretting it for the rest of your life!

Start right this moment to take that step - and you will see the immediate difference this makes in your life!

Stay Strong!!

The purpose of life is not to be happy - but to matter, to be productive, to be useful, to have it make some difference that you have lived at all. ~Leo Rosten

Monday, June 9, 2008

Shhhhh.. Hear That??

Shhh. Listen... Do you hear that?? Probably not. And you are not alone. Seldom in our busy, hustle and bustle lives do we take the time to STOP and LISTEN to the various messages that are put out there for us to hear. Often it is in the least likely places that we do receive a message and learn a valuable lesson.

For me mine came while having stitches removed today and whilst having a small conversation with my doctor as he worked his magic. I had commented on how it is difficult to adjust to Monday mornings, especially after a nice weekend. He smiled at me and said something amazing and enlightening that should serve as a lesson to us all. He said:

"Monday mornings are not a problem for me - they do not affect me in that way. For me Monday mornings are the same as any morning - I do not look at it as Monday morning or Thursday afternoon or Friday evening. No, I take each day, each moment of every single day the same way - I savor it, I slow it down and I enjoy every single second of it. If I am putting on my suit in the morning, I take my time and I enjoy every aspect of it. When I drink my coffee, I take my time and I really enjoy that cup of coffee. I come home and I hug my wife and I take my time to enjoy that hug. If I see someone rushing and racing in their car, I simply let them go ahead and go on with my day. If someone says something controversial or negative, I just smile and let it roll off of my back. The key is to ENJOY the journey, and the only way to do that is to enjoy every single moment no matter how mundane it seems - and not just the momentous ones."

I was amazed at this philosophy he had developed and you could tell just by looking at him as he spoke that he was deeply satisfied, deeply content, and really at peace with his life- all the good and all the bad.

And guess what - YOU can be this happy as well!! You just have to want to be this joyful, step back and savor each moment that makes up this crazy life and path we are traveling on.

Take the good doctor's advice -- no matter what you are doing -who you are speaking with, or what you encounter at any given moment-- endeavor to appreciate it, to enjoy it to the fullest, and do not wait until the end of the journey to see the value in your existence!

Try it -- trust me, he was very convincing and on to something...

Stay Strong!!

Friday, June 6, 2008

Compass North!

"Education is of no value and talent is worthless-unless you have an unwavering aim. Never find yourself without a compass."

---Condoleezza Rice

Much of what we talk about is having a plan. Know where it is you wish to go. Often people don’t know where they wish to go, so they travel either sideways or backward. Our job is to keep you cognizant of a few things so even if you are going sideways, your next move is forward.

If you are going backward, there is an old saying about how to get out of a hole, "stop digging."

The key is to gain traction, where you are right now. How it starts is with a idea that translates into a plan. Write it down, act on it, notice the results and keep repeating the process.

Simple. We want to look to the sky at night and find the North Star.

We will use that as our compass pointing NORTH!

Stay Strong and Stay the Course!


I have found that there are few things as de-mobilizing to people's actions as the notion of "CHANGE"!

And there is nothing as easy to overcome as the FEAR of CHANGE!

CHANGING from our daily habits and safety nets is terrifying to most people and the root cause of failures, self-defeating thoughts and attitudes, and the dreaded STAGNATION!

However, once we step back and dissect what exactly it is that we fear with change, it is clear that the FEAR is completely unfounded and unnecessary.

As with all of these lessons, we must adjust our mindset and FACE our FEARS rationally in order to overcome them. The same is true for this fear of change!

Fear of change stems from our fear of failing, our self-defeating beliefs that scream to us - "You cannot do that - -what if you fail - what if you lose what you have today??"

Well guess what - the alternative to overcoming this fear is Stagnation and atrophy!!! and the next step is death -- death of soul, death of adventure, and death of our self-worth!


When confronted with change, tell yourself immediately that change is a necessary path in all human beings' lives! Change is GROWTH and growth is exactly what we as humans crave, seek and need - even if you do not feel that way!

We are Growth Seeking Beings and when we change our current circumstances and are learning - we are Growing and we are inevitably going to be Happy!

Change is never permanent!! Remind yourself of that!

Embrace it and place your FAITH in the fact that if we keep moving forward and challlenging ourselves to GROW - we will truly be living our lives and not simply spectating!

Monitor your thoughts and FIGHT the negative thoughts that serve as your greatest enemy! Replace them with the positive mantras you have developed and you will STAY STRONG!

Enjoy the Weekend!

"Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts."

--Winston Churchill

Thursday, June 5, 2008

"Pop goes the Weasel and the Weasel goes Pop" - Third Bass


Pop in athletics specifies a certain amount of lift off or energy, that one has. They are described as live bodies, high flame, high twitch guys or gals.

What we all want is to feel more alive. That we have pop.

People will go out of there way to adorn themselves with things that make them feel better. The key is to discover that which makes you feel better and do those things or surround yourself with those things.

Those things will make you more prepared, for what it is you are about to do next.

Henry Aaron stated:

"In playing ball or in life, a person occasionally gets the opportunity to do something great.

When that time comes, only two things matter:

1) Being prepared to seize that moment

2) having the courage to take your best swing."

Get ready to give it your best swing. Have a great Day. Stay Strong!

Everything will be "OK"

We live in a world of terrifying, horrible and unbelievable real-life stories, constantly reported and fed to us by the 24x7 media in order to sensationalize the public and to sell their own media vehicles.

If one can take a positive away from this type of environment it is this -- "My life ain't so bad afterall"!

Think about it - we constantly judge the value of or own lives versus those of our peers, people we see in Hollywood, on TV, magazines etc. It is, unfortunately, human nature to use these as comparisons for our success and our happiness meters - AND it is the predominant reason for our unhappiness, frustration, depression, and malaise!

If we focus on taking a step back and CHANGING our Measurement perspective, we soon come to realize that hey - "my life is in pretty good shape and I have a lot to be thankful and happy about!"

STOP judging your own success against that of others. It is not difficult to do!

If you continue on this current path, your primary goals of HAPPINESS and JOY are impossible!
There are ALWAYS going to be people with bigger bank accounts, bigger homes, bigger yachts, nicer cars, better careers, etc. than you!

It doesn't matter how wealthy you are, someone is inevitably richer or has something you do not have!

That is a FACT and as soon as you recognize this fact and ACCEPT that this fact does not have an iota of influence on YOUR happiness and Joy and Fulfillment, the quicker you will start enjoying your life!

It DOES NOT MATTER!! Repeat that over and over again until it sinks in!

We all end up in the same place when this life is over - and as cliche-ish as it sounds, NO ONE is going to care about the size of your house or cars or wallet when you are gone!

FOCUS and ACT on what matters in life -- helping others, sharing smiles and encouragement, being there for a friend in need or to help a child, changing the world one person at a time through your own positive energy, your own inner strength, your own enthusiasm and drive!

I am not saying you have to take a vow of poverty to be happy either -- plenty of people with sizable wealth are very happy indeed! BUT it is NOT due solely to their wealth - it is in addition to their wealth! They are generally philanthropists and givers - utilizing their wealth to help others and this is where their Happiness is derived.

Stop judging your life by MATERIAL means and start taking inventory of the things you do - Day to Day - that make a difference in not only your life but MORE IMPORTANTLY - the lives of others!

That is SUCCESS and that is a lot harder, and a lot more valuable, than making a lot of money to spend!

Remember - your life is GREAT and Everything will be OK - BUT ONLY if you shift your perspective away from the superficial and material world in which we live and cease from trying to squeeze Happiness from something that will NEVER yield it to you!

Stay Strong and Have a GREAT DAY!

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

Nothing Worth Doing is ever Easy

It is an old adage, but it is so very true. If something is worth achieving, it is generally not that easy to accomplish. So it goes for changing your focus from negative to positive. It is a battle - a battle within your mind that you cannot afford to lose!

Do Not Give in to that Voice that tells you "You are no Good", "These things always happen to you" , "You don't deserve happiness, that job, that boyfriend/girlfriend", "You are worthless", You will never succeed", etc"

Fight those voices that shout down your confidence and faith and realize that YOU control the FOCUS you want to emphasize - You alone!

It is a matter of awareness - and once you are aware you can resist the urge to allow those negative thoughts to compound and talk you out of what it is you wish to achieve!

Tell yourself -- "Not on my Watch"!!

Do not believe everything you hear from your inner voice - as negative thoughts are of no value or worth to you! They only serve to corral your dreams, contain your ambitions, and postpone the Joy that you are entitled to receive!

Is it Easy to do this?? NO!! It is work -- but it is work that you and everyone else in your life cannot afford to have you neglect!

Try it -- Identify the negative voices -- refuse to listen to them -- and replace them with what you know to be true and positive about you!

Remove the Faith that you have put on this inner voice all your life - for such a long time that you now listen to it without challenge!

STOP NOW~~ Now is the time to challenge and replace!

Stay Strong -- the dreary day has given way to a more favorable climate and the BEST IS YET TO COME -- if you are willing to ACCEPT IT!

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

Day Two

I’m pretty Good.

Yesterday we mentioned when things don’t go your way, remember that you aren’t that bad. Todays message to keep you going forward is “ I’m pretty Good”.

Not great, our job is to find a pretty good balance of where we are and move forward.

This isn’t a spoof on Al Franken.

Three words I will leave you with today are Pardon, Passion and Peace.

Pardon for forgiveness if I screw up. We are human and not perfect.

Passion. Allow me to find something that I’m passionate toward. Work, Health, Dieting, Reading, Dancing, Golfing, listening to whatever, yet to find something to be passionate about.

Peace to accept all that has happened and yet the strength to go back to the grind and make this day better than yesterday.


"To make no mistakes is not in the power of man; but from their errors and mistakes, the wise and the good learn wisdom for the future."



The Eagle said...
A few thoughts...I've been officially out of work for the past week. I'm ten pounds overweight. I've got a trick knee that sounds like Rice Krispies every couple of hours. Yesterday after working out, I bumped into the last girl that dumped me on the street, bringing to mind and heart old feelings.

I'm bald. I'm single. I'm broke.

I've never been happier.

Why, you ask? What happy pills am I taking? The answer's none; maybe the occasional protein shake, but other than a good diet that's about it.

Where does the positive outlook come from? Well, I'm one of those guys who's left everything behind in the past and still survived, and never been happpier.

I'm one of those people who could give it all up again, like what's being done right now, and struggle but never feel so alive.

I'm one of those who had to lose everything to realize what was really important.

"The first prerequisite of immortality is death" - Stanislaw Lec

Now mind you, I'm not married. Don't have mortgage payments. No kids I know of. So maybe I don't have the stresses you have. But I know that things have a way of working themselves out.

Whether it's through hard work, facing your fears, setting goals, meeting new people, establishing alliances, competing in various fields, even prayer and reflection...all things come to pass one way or the other. Today I'm sitting here in Starbucks working on a project of mine. The woman next to me asked what I was doing. I responded, "Helping a friend". She couldn't help but smile at that one.

Whatever your challenges, they're not too big to be overcome. Do what must be done to achieve what you want to, respecting your fellow man and woman in the process.

And smile. And keep smiling. You'll find more often than not the world smiles back at you.


Please feel free to Comment to this site!! We NEED YOU!

We are all about "Allied Effort" in our quest for Joy, Happiness, and Fulfillment!

Please comment freely with your feedback, thoughts, issues, or insight!

We Want to hear from you!!!

Stay Strong

Your Choice!!

It is amazing how things reveal themselves to you when you are open and receptive to receiving the messages. I was ordering lunch at a local Metro Cafe yesterday after returning from the gym and the man behind the salad counter said to me "Sir, you are really giving off a positive energy today".

The fascinating thing to me about this comment was that I did not particularly "feel positive" at that moment. We all have pressures in our lives, stresses, worries, concerns, etc. This is the alleged inevitability of life - the various trials and tribulations we all face daily.

Often we let those thoughts COMPOUND and eventually take over our emotions, our moods, our outlooks, and our ENERGY! People see it, notice it - and it is palpable!

What this gentleman at the salad bar enlightened me to was a concept that is as tried and true as the hills -- YOU - WE ALL - have the POWER and the CHOICE to FEEL however we choose!

Sounds like a cliche - I know - but it is the absolute TRUTH!

No matter how bad we feel - how much fear or disappointment or sadness or negativity we have inside us at any given moment - WE CAN CHOOSE to feel otherwise!

Now - I know that simply changing your mind does not instantly make you feel better about whatever is ailing you emotionally -- but the PATTERN and DISCIPLINE of doing this - practicing it whenever we identify a mood-changing, negative thought-compounding will lead to a quicker and more effective change of feelings!

It works - Trust Me! It is not easy but it is not hard either!

Try it TODAY --- monitor your thoughts and emotions today! As soon as you feel angry, bitter, sad, scared, worried, etc -- PUSH that thought out of your mind and replace it with the following FOCUS POINT:

" Better things are in store for me. Fear is not real. I must focus on what I WANT as it will surely come to me."

Say it over and over until your initial thoughts of negativity subside!

Sounds silly - I know --- but what do you have to lose trying it??

It is YOUR CHOICE~ what is it going to be? FEAR or Joy?

Have a Great Day and STAY STRONG!!

Monday, June 2, 2008

Gods in the Chrysalis

Gods in Chrysalis

"Whenever you go out of the doors, draw the chin in, carry the crown of the head high and fill the lungs to the utmost; drink in the sunshine; greet your friends with a smile and put soul into every handclasp.

Do not fear being misunderstood and do not waste a minute thinking about your enemies.

Try to fix firmly in your mind that you would like to do and then without veering off direction, you will move straight to the goal.

Keep your mind on the great and splendid things you would like to do and then as the days go gliding by, you will find yourself unconsciously seizing upon the opportunity that are required for the fulfillement of your desire, just as the coral insect takes from the running tide the element it needs.

Picture in your mind the able, earnest, useful person you desire to be, and the thought you hold is hourly transforming you into that particular individual.

Thought is supreme.

Preserve a right mental attitude - the attitude of courage, frankness and good cheer.

To think rightly is to create.

All things come through desire and every sincere prayer is answered.

We become like that on which our hearts are fixed.

Carry your chin in and the crown of your head high.

We are gods in Chrysalis."

- Elbert Hubbard.

Growth and Strength


“Perfect love casteth out fear” John

Day 1, Lesson 1 “ I’m not that bad”

We often go through life with a series of highs and lows. Our job is to minimize the lows and keep riding the crest of the big wave. "I’m not that bad" should be the mantra when you are having one of those horrible days.

It gets you moving back in the right direction.

When things are going well, it’s easy to think, yeah I’m pretty good. However when the tide turns and you feel as if the world is beating you down, you need to remember that “ I’m not that bad”.

Align yourself with people who will support you in that endeavor. That requires faith and confidence on your part to surrender a bit and allow others to help.

“Perfect love casteth out fear”, reminds us that the things we love in life, don’t allow fear to creep in. It will be vital to set goals based on things you love. Our job is to help you overcome fear. THAT IS A VERY TALL TASK.

The name of our group is ALLIED EFFORT. Only through others can we accomplish great things. Only through others, can we pound out those fears, so that we can walk tall, each and every day.

Quote of the day:

“My sun sets to rise again.”
------ Robert Browning Poet